Deep into the Cosmos Cosmo's Biography
by dagnytheartist
Summary: Cosmo isn't really the idiot we think he is, and never was.
1. Chapter 1

The sun was shining. The flowers were blooming. The birds were singing, and so was a choir. A fairy baby was born.

"Good evening, I'm Fairy Hart! Here on the radio broadcast. A fairy baby was just born! Jorgen Von Strangle claims it will be the last fairy baby ever born. I'm gonna go check things out!"

Fairy Hart flew over to the crowd of people. The fairy baby was so cute. Round, like a normal fairy baby. He had a tiny bit of green hair on his head.

"Aw, he's so cute!" Jorgen said.

Schnozmo, his five year old brother, gave him a wand.

The baby looked at it and wondered what to do with it.

"You wave it and make something appear!" Schnozmo explained.

The baby waved it and made it rain ice cream. The fairies opened their mouths and caught it on their tounges.

"What a wonderful baby!" Jorgen said.

"I want to have one just like him!" Some fairies said. Everyone loved this new baby.

"What should I name him?" Mama Cosma asked her husband.

Her greedy husband, Papa Cosma, rubbed his hands together, smiling evily. He knew he would make a fortune off of his kid. Commercials, charged wishes, who knows what this kid could do for him?

"I think we should name him Richie!"

"I think you should name him Smarty, because he's smart!" A fairy called.

"No- name him Geniusy, because he's a genius!" Another fairy called out.

"No! You should name him Cosmo- because his genius will be used to help other beings throughout the cosmos of space!" Someone called out.

"Cosmo is a nice name!" Mama Cosma said. "What do you think Schnozmo?"

"It rhymes with my name!" Schnozmo giggled. "Sure!"

"What about you?" She asked her husband.

"Oh, yeah, whatever! Lets go inside!"

"Why?"

"I want to tell you my ideas for this kid honey!"

"Okey." They went inside their home. Cosmo looked around and smiled. While his parents were talking about the best way to make his dad rich, Cosmo had his first idea.

"TADA!" He said, proudly inventing the world's first television set.

"Oh, this is gonna be good!" Papa Cosma said, smiling.

* * *

A few weeks after he was born, an anti-fairy named Anti-Cosmo was born. He was square. He didn't ever do anything, he was so stupid he couldn't even talk. The only time fairies ever mentioned him was when they mentioned that Cosmo was so smart, his Anti-Fairy was stupid.

When he was a child, Cosmo didn't have any friends. He had groupies, sure, but no friends. He didn't mind it too much though, he was fine just working on new inventions. Sometimes, though, he did get bored and write a comic strip he called "What Would an Idiot Do?" In the comic strip, there was a fairy named Cosmo who looked just like himself, only he was an idiot. He loved corn, and was allergic to nuts but ate them anyway because he was too stupid to remember. He had a pet dragon named Snowball, whome everyone in FairyWorld hated because he destroyed stuff. And he wore adult diapers. Cosmo made his life in "What Would an Idiot Do?" simular to his own life. His mother, who never payed attention to him because he had the intelligence of an adult, payed TONS of attention to him in the comic strip because he calculated that in reality, if he were that stupid, his mother would act overprotective and always watch him.

* * *

In his teen years, Cosmo had noticed one girl in particular, Wanda. She was the best looking girl in his high school, but she was already dating Juanndissimo, a foreign exchange student. One day, at a school dance, he decided to impress her with his genius.

"Hi Wanda, and Juanndissimo. Weird running into you here huh?" He said nervously.

Juanndissimo stared, confused. "Wow Cosmo. You may be very intelligent, but you have such an unmanly and high-pitched voice. I never would have guessed."

Cosmo tried to remember his line. "Um, I have a joke for you!"

"What is it?" Juanndissimo asked.

"What if, say, an idiot were to come to this party and try to impress a girl? The dumbest thing he would do would be if he were really weak and tried to pick up a stick. Get it?" Juanndissimo and Wanda stared at him. "If that happened, in real life, wouldn't it be funny?" Wanda looked a little creeped out, and Juanndissimo just laughed and said "That is the stupidest joke I've ever heard!"

"Dumbest!" Cosmo corrected.

"What?"

"That is the_ dumbest _joke I've ever heard! Or you can say _most stupid_! You said it wrong!"

Juanndissimo glared at him. "Are you trying to make me look bad in front of my Wanda?"

Cosmo muttered "She's not _your_ Wanda."

Juanndissimo now looked furious. "WHAT?"

"She's not your Wanda! You can say a toy is _your_ toy, or a doll is _your_ doll, but fairies don't belong to other fairies unless you mean slavery! And doubt someone as brainless as you could make someone as intelligent as Wanda your slave!"

Wanda looked furious. "Now look Cosmo! Sure he may be grammerly incorrect sometimes, but that doesn't give you the right to correct him and act like a jerk! And when Juanndissimo said my Wanda, he meant I am _his_ girlfriend! And he's _my_ boyfriend! And if this is your way of trying to win me- forget it! I'm staying with him!"

Cosmo hadn't calculated his plan correctly, in his mind that was the only reason his plan didn't work. He must have done something wrong.

In his last year of high school, he got a ton of signitures from different fairies. Mostly groupies and fans of his inventions, no one ever mentioned how they thought of him as a fairy except for one fairy.

In the corner of one page, was written _Cosmo- I will hate you forever! Wanda_. Cosmo felt really bad about that. Sure, he could ignore it, but he'd be ignoring the only REAL feelings someone wrote about him in his yearbook.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2: Overcrowding

One day something strange happened. This should have been an already-addressed issue, but no one noticed until now how bad it was.

Fairy World was over-crowded.

The fairies never noticed until the year after Cosmo graduated, that there were too many fairies and not enough houses. Because of Cosmo, a lot of fairies wanted more and more children and now- well- now those children were doubling the population. And now that they were old enough to live in their own houses, that's when everyone realized there were no more houses.

"Who are we to blame?" Jorgan asked.

"I blame Cosmo!" One fairy said. "I wanted to have a son just like him, and now we have 5 little brats who all want to move out!"

"I blame Cosmo's parents!" Another fairy said. "They had another kid and he spoiled everything!" Then a bunch of the fairies started pounding at the door of Cosmo's parents' house.

"What is going ON?" Papa Cosma demanded.

"We want Cosmo! We want Cosmo!" The crowd chanted.

"Well Cosmo's in his room!" Papa Cosma slammed the door and yelled for his son.

"What is it?" Cosmo asked. "Oh, by the way, here's a funny idea for What an Idiot Would Do! Say Cosmo's wife and godchild were discussing why his wife married him, and the godchild says that it couldn't be his good looks or his brains. Then Cosmo would say something like 'Of course it was my brains! Now if you excuse me, I'm gonna pour some water on this cat!' Then he poofs up a cat and pours some water on it and of course the cat claws him up into pieces! Well Dad, isn't that funny?"

His dad thought about it and frowned. "No. That gag would never make me rich." He opened the curtains and showed Cosmo the angry mob. "THIS is what's wrong! Everyone's mad at ME, for creating YOU! You're the genius, figure out what I should do!"

"Um, if my calculations are correct..." he got out a calculator. "You could go back in time and tell you and mom never to have had me in the first place!"

"Sounds good to me."

"No wait!" Cosmo stopped his dad. " Would you really do that so that the mob wouldn't bother us?"

"Yes." Then Papa Cosma thought about it. "No wait, that would mean I wouldn't have these piles of money you made me."

"There are a lot of other options. Like, you could go back in time to mess with my DNA and make me really stupid."

"Naw, then that would mean I wouldn't have these piles of money you made me. What else?"

"Going back in time and-"

"Okey, is there ANY solution that doesn't involve going back in time?"

Cosmo thought about it and shook his head.

Papa Cosma sighed. "We'll leave this situation to take care of itself."

* * *

Things didn't just blow over like Papa Cosma thought they would. In fact, things got worse. Fairies would start riots, pound at the doors, and demand Cosmo do something about their overcrowding problem (he WAS a genius, so they had grown accustomed to depending on him to fix things.)

But Cosmo couldn't even talk to them, because he wasn't even ON FairyWorld anymore. He was on Yugopotamia, feeling sorry for himself he had run away from home and was living with his only real friend, Mark Chang.

"I think those other fairies need to like chill out man!" Mark said. "I'd send Yugopotamian armies to like stop them, but they like have that totally unfair advantage of living forever and all eternity!"

"That's it!" Cosmo smiled. "I got an idea!"

"Boy, have I been waiting to hear THAT phrase out of ya like forever!" Mark smiled, happy his friend finally was happy. "So like, what's this totally radical plan?"

"I need to do some expiraments..." Cosmo thought aloud. "But if I do this right, and my theory is correct, fairy eternity can actually live through time. Therefore, if I go back in time and change the way I acted when I was born, I can guide my younger self through a great childhood WITHOUT ever disappearing because of the space-time continuum is no match for fairy eternity!"

"Okey, WHAT?" Mark asked, scratching his head. "I like so didn't understand that at all!"

"Oh I can explain better..." Cosmo said. "I've got time on my side!"

Suddenly, Fairy Force jets started heading towards Yugopotamia. Mark and Cosmo screamed.

"Uh oh! Looks like they found you bro!"

"OH, um, but I haven't done the tests yet!" Cosmo panicked and panicked. "I can't leave now! Who knows what could happen?"

"You should like leave!"

"But-"

"LEAVE!" Cosmo quickly waved his wand, and poofed away to the past.

* * *

**What will happen to Cosmo when he goes to the past? How will Cosmo become stupid? You may think you figured it out, but this will have an unexpected surprise on CHAPTER THREE!**


	3. Chapter 3

**_Chapter 3 :_**

Cosmo opened his eyes. He was standing on a cloud. A FairyWorld cloud. A small wind blew a newspaper in his face. The newspaper said "**Fairy News- October 12, 1030**

He had done it. He had gone back in time. To the time before he would be born.

"I'll be so glad when we have the baby." Mama Cosma's voice surprised Cosmo. Back then, her voice was so, motherlike and not grandmother like.

"Me too!" Papa Cosma patted his tummy. "I just love this baby..." he said, in a loving voice. Then he frowned. "Oh great! Do you know how much it's gonna cost us to send TWO kids to Fairy Colleges?" He yelled. Then tears filled his eyes and he layed on the floor crying. "WAAAA! Our babies will grow up so FAST!"

"I'll also be glad when you stop having those stupid mood swings." Mama Cosma muttered.

Cosmo thought of what his plan would be to change things.

* * *

"Good night husband dear." Mama Cosma said. She and Papa Cosma were about to fall asleep. Little did she know that her future son was standing outside the door, listening and waiting.

"Okey, I think they're asleep." he thought to himself. "Good."

After spending hours at the library reading all about what fairies call "brain cell molecule personality changing" he was finally able to figure out how to do what he was about to do.

He walked slowly into his parent's bedroom. He couldn't help but feel weird, he was going to CHANGE his own personality. "Good bye brain." He mumbled. "You will no longer be a genius. You will now be, well, average. I'm going to miss you, but it's for the best. He took his wand and zapped himself into his own brain. But it wasn't exactly HIS brain he entered, it was the unfinished brain of him as a fetus.

The inside of his head looked like a control room. It had a bunch of people in chairs, but the bunches of people were babies. They didn't really do anything except read the books with titles like "How to be Angry" and "How to be Upset and Cry to Get Your Way".

Cosmo approached one of the babies. "Um, excuse me? But can I speak to the 'Head Head Persons'?"

The baby turned around. "You mean Mommy and Daddy? Dey're ober dare." The baby pointed to a door.

"Okey thanks." Cosmo walked to the door and opened it. "Um, head head persons?"

The room had a person sitting in a black computer desk chair. The person had his back faced torwards Cosmo, and didn't bother to turn around. "Can I help you?" The person said, speaking in a monotone.

"Um, I'd like to- hey! I recognize your voice!"

Head Pixie turned around. "Can I help you?"

"Head Pixie? What are you doing in my head?"

"Well, after FairyWorld made us pixies leave, I decided maybe I could get a job at this. I'm the daddy."

"What happened to the mother?"

"I kicked her out, duh! She's the creative but stupid half of your brain, and I cannot work with stupid people. Although, I did keep her to work on the emotions."

"So in a brain, there's a bunch of guys in chairs who are your emotions. But there's also a Mom and Dad, and your the Dad of my brain?"

"Not really. I just came here before anyone else did, and adopted all the baby emotions. So you're the future Cosmo, am I correct?"

"Um, yes. How did you know?"

"Well, I like things to be planned ahead so I was already working on what you're going to look like as an adult. Since I'm uncreative, I just decided to make you look just like your dad, but without the glasses. "

_So that's why I'm different. _Cosmo thought._ I've been controlled by HP! Figures, I'm just like like him in the sense of being smart but uncreative. The Mom probably thought of the "What Would An Idiot Do?" comics. But wait... _"Hey, if I'm being controlled by you, how come I'm not evil?"

"'Cause I already had an evil plan." HP smiled. "You're the most hated fairy in the universe, right? And the fairies are expecting you to fix the overcrowding problem, right?"

Cosmo's mouth fell open. "You mean, you made me smart so that the fairies would have children like me, so that FairyWorld got crowded, so that they'd be mad at me... where do you benefit?"

"The fairies would try to destroy you, then they would battle each other, then they would destroy FairyWorld and eachother, then WE pixies would get FairyWorld. Get the picture?"

"Wow, that's so confusing even I could barely follow it along."

"In other words, I planned the whole thing out."

"But were you expecting me to come here?"

"Actually no. My plan was to leave right before the fairies got to Mark's space ship and destroyed you, which I probably did, and leaving Mom to take over. So now Mom's probably controlling you."

"Again, what?"

"See? You can't even follow along because I'm not in your head anymore."

"Wow, um, well, I know you're evil, so I'm definentally defeating you!" Cosmo used his wand and turned HP into a duck.

HP looked mad. He tried to reach into his pocket for his phone, but it fell and Cosmo swooped in and got it. "Hah!" Cosmo said victoriously. Cosmo took his wand and poofed HP duck away.

"Great, but who's going to be the 'Dad' now?" Cosmo wondered.

_Don't worry Cosmo. I remember my old friend Charles wanted to control a mind in this time. I could get him._

"Uh thanks?" Suddenly Cosmo jumped. "Wait, who was that?"

_Me. I'm your "Dad" in your mind. Don't worry, I'm not HP. I took his spot after he left- right when the fairies were about to destroy you._

"Do I know you?"

_No. I'm not a fairy, I'm a cyclops who was looking for a job._

"Um, okey? So what do I do now?"

_Call him. I know his cell phone number._

_

* * *

_**The story's not over yet (even though this chapter is.) Tell me if I'm doing things way too fast or too slow! Or if this is confusing! Or if this is good! Review please!**_  
_


	4. Chapter 4

The sun was shining. The flowers were blooming. The birds were singing, and there was a choir. A fairy baby was born.

Cosmo was hiding in a randomly placed bush, getting out his binoculars and watching everyone crowd around Cosmo's parents' house.

Something seemed wrong with the crowd though. Instead of squeeling over how cute the baby was, people were giving puzzled looks to each other. Right when Cosmo was about to get a good look at the baby, a reporter stepped in the way.

"This is a story!" The reporter took a picture. " **'Fairy Baby Somehow Looks Like a Human!'** "

"Wait, what?" Cosmo rushed in between the crowd. Forgetting he was supposed to be hidden, Cosmo went to the front and saw why everyone was puzzled; his baby self looked human! With wings of course.

"How did this happen?" Someone muttered.

One genius fairy spoke from the crowd. "Well, there's only two possibilities! One is that one of the baby's parents is a human..."

"Not true!" Papa Cosma yelled. "There is NO way that is true!"

"The other is that someone messed with his DNA."

Everyone gasped. To mess with a fairy's DNA, you have to go INSIDE a fairy baby. Doing such an act was considered criminal!

"I'll send in the Fairy Force to locate the criminal!" Jorgen said. "In the meantime, let's just squeal over how cute the baby is and look past the fact that he looks like a human."

"I wonder how he is with a wand." Little Schnozmo gave Cosmo a wand. Cosmo looked at it and shook it happily.

"Aw..." Jorgen said happily. "It's so cute!"

The baby took it's wand. Cosmo started sweating in fear. _I thought he was just going to be average! _He thought. _He's not supposed to poof up ice cream! If he does that, it will just be a repeat of MY life!_

But instead of doing anything genius, the baby zapped Jorgen with lightning, laughing stupidly.

"AND DEADLY!" Jorgen yelled. "He will be the last fairy baby ever born!"

"Yes!" Cosmo said, glad he'd solved the overcrowding problem. But there was still something he felt was wrong. Why did the baby do something stupid? Is he really that stupid? It's almost as if he's copying my- Cosmo opened his mouth in realization. He smiled. What do you know? Even a kid who isn't as genius as me can figure out a way to make people laugh better than I could.

Baby Cosmo started flying around. "SNOWBALL!" He yelled, poofing up his first red dragon. The dragon started destroying FairyWorld, and Cosmo mumbled "Then again, maybe not 'laugh' as much as 'scream in terror,' but you get the idea."

**What did Cosmo find out about his baby self? Why is baby Cosmo acting like a moron? What is he copying off of Cosmo1? Stay tuned!**


	5. Chapter 5

Little Cosmo was playing with his new wand, training Snowball to breathe bigger fire, when he saw a shadow of someone behind him. He thought it was his dad of course, so he said a simple "Daddy?"

"Shh!" Cosmo the older took baby Cosmo and poofed them both to a quiet little shed in FairyWorld.

"Daddy?"

"No, it's..." He stopped and decided to let the kid find out on his own. "Well, unless you're a complete moron you will find out shortly, but I doubt you are. I have my own theory." He smiled. "We shall start with some tests. Test number 1," He poofed them to an almost-empty room with just a mirror, a desk, a chair, a crayon, and a piece of paper. He took baby Cosmo's wand away. "The objective is to see how you behave on your own. With no one around you. And if you're as much like me as I'm guessing, you'll like being alone." Cosmo poofed himself into the room next to Testing 1 Room, and watched baby Cosmo through the one-sided window.

Baby Cosmo sat in his seat for a few minutes. Then he started flying around. Nothing happened. He looked at the piece of paper. He took the blue crayon at the desk, and started drawing... something.

"Ah hah!" Adult Cosmo poofed in the room, unintentionally surprising baby Cosmo. "I knew it!" He looked at the piece of paper and his usual "I was right!" smile dropped. "Nice, er... spaghetti or string Cosmo." On the piece of paper was just random scribbles. Should've taken into account that babies were never great artists. He thought to himself. "Okey, um, onto Test 2."

Test 2 was a room with a bunch of toy puppets in it. The puppets were humans, fairies, horses, cats, dogs, just ordinary puppets. Cosmo poofed himself and his baby self into this room.

"There, now you have 'people'. Now the objective is to see how you react to pretend people. You do realize these people are not alive, correct?" Baby Cosmo gave him a confused look, one Adult Cosmo had only had one time in his life. It was when Wanda rejected him over Juanndissimo.

"I'll try to explain it better; You understand- I mean- well, do you know these puppet- I mean- toys are most certainly not alive- I mean- are not real people, correct? I mean, right?" Baby Cosmo nodded. "Oh good, that was hard to try saying something in a more understandable manner, but worth it when I get accurate test results because of your knowledge on the inanimate objects!" When Adult Cosmo looked over he noticed Baby Cosmo had the confused look again. "Wat?"

"Never mind, I don't want to explain that right now. Now, onto Test 2!" Adult Cosmo left the room.

Baby Cosmo looked around the room at the puppets. He sat on the floor and started scooting on his butt across the rug, with his tongue sticking out, and a stupid grin on his face. Adult Cosmo took notes.

"So, my theory was correct. You're not really that stupid, you're just playing. You're trying to make people laugh, aren't you?" Baby Cosmo nodded. "Yes, so you're not a genius, but not a moron either. I can live with that." Then Adult Cosmo frowned as something occured to him. "Oh no, I forgot to test whether or not I will dissappear! According to the space-time continuim theory, I should be dissappearing and my younger self living the life I never did!" Baby Cosmo gasped, and hugged Adult Cosmo's leg tightly.

"Aw, that is adorable." Adult Cosmo smiled. "You know, another thing just occured to me. Fairies are immortal, which means that even the element of time shouldn't be able to make me go away." Then he frowned. "Wow, that was out of character. Although that is a comforting thought, even the element of time should be able to force me into non-existence." Baby Cosmo squeezed harder. "Well, I guess it's a chance I'll have to take."


	6. Chapter 6

"We should teach Cosmo how to fly!" Papa Cosma said one day. "He still has that bad reverse problem!"

Schnozmo started laughing. "It's so funny to watch! Cosmo's like- 'I'm gonna go forward!' and he goes backward instead!* He's so stupid!"

"Be nice!" Mama Cosma warned Schnozmo. "He's only a baby!"

"By the way... where is Cosmo?" Papa Cosma asked.

"Cosmo!" Schnozmo yelled. "C'mon Dad, I'll help you look for Cosmo!"

"I'll look for the video camra!" Mama Cosma said.

Meanwhile, Adult Cosmo was playing with Baby Cosmo, when his wand suddenly started beeping. "Oh no, it's the 'M.C.A.P.A.A.C.A.!' That stands for 'Mama Cosma and Papa Cosma are Coming Alert! Oh, but you're not done with your puzzle!" Suddenly, Adult Cosmo snapped his fingers. "Hey, I know! I'll go and pretend to be you! That way you can finish your puzzle! If you're really like me, you HATE not finishing a puzzle!" Adult Cosmo poofed back to Mama Cosma and Papa Cosma's house, in the form of a human-looking fairy baby.

"Found Cosmo!" Schnozmo yelled when Cosmo poofed in the room.

"Found the camra!" Mama Cosma poofed in, carrying the camra. "Want to trade?" Mama Cosma took baby Cosmo (which was really adult Cosmo in disquise) and Schnozmo took the camra.

"Okey Cosmo," Papa Cosma stretched his arms. "Fly to Daddy!"

Cosmo thought about this for a minute. He didn't want to fly to the man he called Father and not Daddy. For one thing, his Dad was always making money off of him as a child. He was still pretty mad about it, and he felt like gaining some revenge. He smiled and said "Yay!", turning his dad into a real fly. This litterally versus figuretively thing was something he and his dad both found annoying if someone got confused, and besides, he always wanted to do something like that to his dad.

Schnozmo gasped. Mama Cosma tried to be calm about it. "Give Mommy the wand now, sweetie!"

Cosmo flew around, zapping things and having the time of his life. Who knew it was so much fun to be bad?

"GIVE MOMMY THE WAND!" Mama Cosma yelled.

"Yayyyy!" Cosmo said. "Daddy Daddy Daddy!"

Schnozmo stopped the camra.

* * *

"Daddy?" Baby Cosmo kept arguing with Adult Cosmo about where his daddy was.

"Look, I told you, I turned Father- I mean- Daddy into a fly, and I have no idea where he is!"

A fly buzzed around and landed on Baby Cosmo's nose. "Daddy?"

"No Cosmo, that's probably just a normal fly." Adult Cosmo sighed. He felt really bad about Papa Cosma.

Baby Cosmo looked sad, but quickly tried to cheer himself up. He gave Adult Cosmo a picture he drew. "Wat wood an idiut du?" it said. In the picture was a baby, Cosmo, destroying FairyWorld with his pet dragon, Snowball.

"You know, that is a funny idea you had. Turning you're 'What Would an Idiot Do?' comics into live performances. The problem is, other fairies think you really are an idiot! And the only way of proving you're not, is to reveal my existence."

Just then, Baby Cosmo had a big idea. He poofed up a television set on the news station. "Good evening, I'm Fairy Hart, with some news about the fairy who may have messed with Cosmo's DNA!" Adult Cosmo gasped, he had forgotten about that.

"I'm standing here with the Fairy Force, who you may be seeing busting into your homes to find the fairy! Jorgan, tell us, where will you be searching next?"

"We will be searching the entire FairyWorld! So if you are the fairy- you should probably RUN!"

"Thanks Jorgan. Up next-" Baby Cosmo turned off the tv, and gave Adult Cosmo a worried look.

"Wow, I better go! Thanks for doing that Cosmo!" He and his baby self hugged. "But, how am I going to live in FairyWorld?"

Baby Cosmo turned on the tv again, just in case it would give any new ideas.

"Up next- Stay tuned for information about pregnant Anti-Mama Cosma and the new baby that will be Anti-Cosmo!" The two Cosmos waited for the commercials, and the news came back on.

"Hi, I'm Fairy Hart, here with predictions on the new Anti-Baby! Since Cosmo is such a moron, we predict Anti-Cosmo will be an evil genius! Let's go live to the pregnant anti-Mama Cosma." Baby Cosmo turned the tv off and pointed at the screen.

"Hey, you're right!" Adult Cosmo smiled his first evil smile. "If the public wants an evil baby, and evil baby they'll get! You following this?" Baby Cosmo nodded. "Look out world, it's time to meet- ANTI-COSMO!" Adult Cosmo laughed his first evil laugh. Then he turned to Baby Cosmo. "What do you think? Is it believable?" Baby Cosmo shook his head and put his finger in his throat. "Yeah, I'll work on that."

* * *

***Alright, that part I included because it happened with my little brother Liam. He used to crawl backwards and would get mad because he was trying to crawl forwards, and like any good big sister I would sit and watch and laugh at him. I know he was just a baby, but it was funny to watch him. **


	7. Chapter 7

A few days later, Anti-Cosmo was born. A crowd gathered around Anti- Papa Cosma and Anti-Mama Cosma's house to see the new baby.

The door opened, and Anti-Papa Cosma and Anti-Mama Cosma were holding the new baby. But one millisecond after the baby was brought outside, something green that was running fast took the baby and his parents away. Everyone was in shock.

Cosmo poofed the family away to YugoPotamia. "Alright, we don't have much time. I'll explain the plan..."

"What d'yall want with us?" Anti-Papa Cosma asked. "We didn't do anyting to yall!"

"I need to take your baby and put him on this planet and turn INTO your baby and have you guys pretend to raise me."

"What?"

Cosmo explained the plan, and his parents' Anti fairies agreed to raise him. Their stupid but harmless anti-baby would be raised on YugoPotamia. Baby Cosmo could carry on with his jokes, and fairies would think he was a moron, and Adult Cosmo would pretend to be his own Anti-Fairy. The plan seemed evil, and stupid Anti-Papa Cosma and Anti-Mama Cosma liked the sound of that.

Cosmo went to some random house, and turned Anti-Cosmo into a Yugopotamian baby. The couple adopted Anti-Cosmo, and Cosmo turned into baby Anti-Cosmo. The family went back to Anti-FairyWorld and pretended the kidnapper was gone.

* * *

Years passed, and Cosmo knew now that he had to continue with his "jokes", even if he didn't want to. Everyone thought he was a moron, and he had to continuously pretend to be one. But by then he was used to it, and he considered it fun. Blowing up his Fairy training schools, poofing up his dragon Snowball, he never got tired of doing that stuff.

When he was in highschool, he got a crush on a girl named Wanda. And the day before the dance, he tried to ask her.

"Hi Wanda! Hi foreign exchange student Juanndissimo!"

They turned around. "Um, hi Cosmo." Wanda said.

"Greeting not-so-buff moron!" Juanndissimo said.

Cosmo couldn't help but be a bit mad. Juanndissimo was not nice. "Hey Juanndissimo- PUDDING!"

"What?"

"Pudding! Pu-dding! Isn't that funny? Pu-dding!"

"Not really."

Wanda spoke up. "Um, I think it's funny." She said, trying to be nice.

"You say it then!" Cosmo told her.

"Um, pu-dding?"

"Haha hahahaha! You said 'pu-', then 'ding!' Hahahaha!"

For some reason, even though it was a common word, she started giggling. "Um, yeah. Hehe. Pu-dding!"

Juanndissimo got jelous. "That's not very funny at all!"

"It is!" Wanda said, defending Cosmo. "A little, I guess. Pu-dding. Heh."

"Well, you know you're going to the dance with me!"

"Hold on!" Wanda got a little mad. "You didn't ask me, and I never said I would!"

"But- I'm the sexiest guy in school!"

"So?"

"So, you're coming to the dance with me!"

"No thanks!" Wanda looked at Cosmo. "Pu-dding!"

Cosmo started laughing again. And now Wanda was laughing too. Furious, Juanndissimo flew away.

* * *

Wanda and Cosmo went to the dance, and Cosmo pretty much wrecked the place with Snowball. Wanda didn't care that much, she just muttered "You're such an idiot." to herself. But the music was still going, so they kept dancing.

And years and years later, World War one and World War two passed, and Cosmo and Wanda got married. But apparently, the REAL Anti-Cosmo that was a YugoPotamian visited Atlantis and a mermaid turned him into a fairy. Cosmo learned about this and had to go to Atlantis to convince the mer-people not to tell FairyWorld. They refused, and he had to sink Atlantis. They rebuilt it, so he had to destroy it again, and this cycle continued nine times. Wanda never found out until years later.

Also, Cosmo and Wanda had TONS of godkids. Walt Disney, Tina Turner, Mary-Ann, and later; Timmy Turner, who wished for them to have a baby, Poof. Life was happy.

* * *

But one day, something unexpected happened. Anti-Cosmo, who was really Cosmo from another time zone, felt funny. Not haha funny, bad funny.

He looked in the mirror, and couldn't see anything different about him. He had two eyes, a nose, four fingers on one hand, three fingers on the other, two ears... _WAIT! THREE_ FINGERS? Cosmo took another look at his left hand. Only three fingers, and no thumb.

He did some tests in his secret lab. Foop was playing with some blocks on the floor.

"Foop, what are you doing in my lab?"

"Oh, hello Father, or should I say, ANTI-FATHER?"

Cosmo gasped. "You were reading my biography I was writing about myself in third-person, weren't you?"

"Yes, and I must say, it's _very _interesting!"

"Where is it now?"

"Back on the shelf, where I found it. You don't think I would _do_ anything with it, would you?"

"Of course you would! You could show it to Fairy Hart, or rip out the pages and let all of FairyWorld's residents catch them like snowflakes with their tongues, or publish it on in FairyWorld and sell it to a book store, or..." Suddenly, Cosmo noticed Foop was writing this down.

"Thank you Father. I was just going to show it to Fairy Hart, but those ideas were a LOT more creative! Ta-ta!" Foop poofed the biography back in his hands, and left.

So Cosmo, er, I guess I might as well say _I,_ started writing this down in my newest chapter I haven't put in the book yet. I should probably go find Timmy and the gang now, but I had to finish this first.


End file.
